Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came?: War is brewing between the soldiers at an otherwise quiet army base and the civilians of a nearby Southern town. Brian Keith is an officer who tries to keep the peace. However, peace is hard to come by with Ernest Borgnine as a stereotypical dumb hick sheriff who's quick to call in the local militia. Tony Curtis plays a skirt-chasing sergeant who can't stay out of trouble and soon lands in jail. Brian Keith borrows a tank to release his friend from jail. Things get more chaotic after that.